FREE WISHES

READ ALL ABOUT IT!

I have bowed to public non-demand and initiated a free promotion. One of my novels - Trouble Cross - is going to be available to download at nil pence on Friday 2nd August and Saturday 3rd August. What more can you wish for?

All I ask in return is that you spread the word - after the free promotion is over, of course - and a nice review on Amazon if you are so inclined.

For those of you interested, the print versions have taken a step further with the publisher now in possession of the full manuscripts.

In other news, animal lovers have been asking for consideration for our furry friends. In this weather the last thing you want to be is a little otter.

MEDIUM TIME NO BLOG

Well, I was getting fed up of saying buy my books all the time.

Anyway, there is now the real possibility that I might get them in print. A colleague pointed me in the direction of a publisher who published his friends book. I emailed them and told them to check out my books on Amazon and they quickly emailed back to say they had and could I send them a submission. Now any writer who has tried to sell a manuscript knows the hard slog trying to get a literary agent interested and now I had a bite from an actual publisher. I sent of the regulatory 3 chapters and synopsis on both books and now they have asked to see the full manuscripts.

But let's not count chickens before the rooster has seen the hen. Fingers crossed though.

In other news.....er no, sorry, there is no other news. Roll on football season.

For those of you with absolutely no interest in my battles with the Express Sunday puzzle page I smashed the 30% barrier today - 26% i.e 33 minutes to do 4 puzzles with a combined target of 128 minutes. Just wish I had some challengers.

Now as more than one person in the office think I look like Robin Williams - whether they mean Mork or Mrs Doubtfire I am not sure - I will sign off in his customary fashion.

Nanu nanu.

THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE!

One sale this week - which makes a total of one in June. Still, I have now sent both manuscripts to a proper publisher for consideration as printed books.

In addition, I found this website where they give you a free review of your book in 10-12 weeks so I sent both off. It is time to know the truth. Can I actually write? Anything less than 4 or 5 stars and it is a bit of a failure so we will wait and see.

Of course, there is nothing to stop anyone having stumbled on here buying one now.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/REWIND-ebook/dp/B00ANX65M6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1371388541&sr=1-1&keywords=david+wardle

SMALL PRINT

Not been on here for a while. Last week was a bad week. I got sacked by my publisher by a stinking email. This means the print versions are out of the window. Or does it? I was pointed in the direction of proper book publisher that may be interested. They were enough so to ask me for a submission, so fingers crossed that both books might get a proper publication and book launch.

TURNING BACK TIME

How many people have wished they could go back and start again? Millions I would guess. I certainly did and still do.

That was my inspiration for writing "Rewind". It was easy to determine that the only way one could have things turn out differently if one went back with the knowledge that this was a second chance. That's what my main character does. He doesn't know why or whether he is mad or dead.

Back in 1971, in his 8 year old body and with 40 years knowledge. How could he fail to vastly improve his lot. It is not as easy as you think.

I started off with a bit of my own childhood because I wanted to rewrite my own life and see how it owuld turn out. I soon realised this would not work. If you 8 year old woke up and said he had come back from the future a straitjacket would soon follow. If you think that going back with knowledge brings happiness and riches you are in for a disappointment.

Intrigued? If so, follow one of the links in earlier posts.

BRITAIN'S GOT TALENT?

I have always wanted to be a full time author. Of course, that statement is relative. I didn't want to be an author as a kid for instance. In fact the only time I ever professed an ambition to do any particular job was at 11 when I wanted to be a footballer. The fact that none of the family were into sport and because of that I only started playing the game at 10, there was no way that was going to happen.

No, I mean from about 17 or 18, having been working a couple of years in insurance and looking for something better. The fact that I am still in insurance ?? years later is perhaps some indication of my prowess in the writing arena, or perhaps not. It may all have been so different if my first attempt had taken off. I was only 18 and my presentation sucked, so much so that I don't think any of the publishers I sent the messy manuscript too ever read it.

Over the years I have written 3 novels, all whilst working full time,and I still don't know if I'm any good. My first book was eventually published but by a vanity publisher - which I didn't understand about at the time - so no surprise it only sold 72 copies. My other two books have been available as e-books on Kindle since December - as anyone unfortunate enough to have stumbled on this blog more than once will know.

The thing is everyone and his dog is writing a book these days and even though, after strong hints from some people, my books are now priced at 97p each, sales are still way behind my first book. Now, apparently Amazon cannot let me know the number of hits compared to the number of sales, which would at least give me some feedback on how many potential readers looked but didn't like. My own research would seem to indicate that any search on genre would not bring up my books as they are so far down the rankings.

Word of mouth seems to be the best method of spreading the word but when you have the social circle of an Ebenezer Scrooge / Baldrick hybrid that is not easy either. This blog then is the only way of getting me out there.

YOUR MISSION IF YOU CHOOSE TO ACCEPT IT IS TO FOLLOW THE LINK AND HAVE A LOOK AT THE BOOKS. (see previous blogs for link.)

You don't need to buy - but where else can you get a good laugh for 97p - just post a comment on why you didn't.

For anyone with a competitive nature though you could take part in Project 200. I get no cheque until I have earned £100. Currently I am at £34 so at 0.33p per book I need another 200 sales before I need to bother the tax man.

There are allegedly some Kindle Millionaires out there but I don't know how they did it. There must be millions more like me who wait in vain to be discovered. Britain undoubtably has writing talent - I am not counting myself among them - and wouldn't it be nice if there was a show where someone could be discovered. If only I was a singer or dancer.

If there is anyone who visits this blog voluntarily I would be pleased to know what makes you come back for more punishment.

PUBLIC HEALTH WARNING!
As I am off work for a week with nowhere to go I feel obligated to make a daily entry here. 
(That might just be an idle threat though. We all get idle sometimes.)

FAIRY TALE OF NEW DORK

Being low in the Kindle rankings the only thing to do - other than ask you to denote 97p to a penniless author - is do something new which will be therefore nearer the top. Some years ago I started writing some proverb fairy tales. This may be my next effort although a completely different tack - that's kids stuff I hear you say. Would this then be of interest to today's hi-tech kids. If you have stumbled across this blog and are a parent ofchildren of fairy tale age why not test it out. Let me know via a comment.

Then later, after you have read them to sleep have a few laughs with one of my novels.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Ddigital-text&field-keywords=david+wardle

THE CAREFUL PRINCE

A long time ago in a far off land there lived a king and queen with their three sons. One day the king decided that it was time for his sons to go out into the world to seek their fortunes.

"Listen to me, my sons," he said to them. "It is time for you to set out into the wide world to see what you can make of yourselves. At the end of five years the one of you who has fared the better will be king when I am gone."

Now the eldest son was not happy to hear this for he felt it was his rightful place to be the next king. However, he could see that he could not change the king's mind and being strong on action, if also a little rash, he set out immediately, determined he would fare better than his brothers.

The other two sons set out at the same time but went their different ways. The second eldest was carefree and a little lazy. He liked nothing better than to while away the hours having fun. To his mind the task before him was too much like hard work but he did like the idea of being king so he took leave of his younger brother with good intentions.

The youngest of the princes was not as strong as his brothers but he was thoughtful, careful and kind hearted. Of all the three princes he was the one who was least wanted to be king. He was just happy to be travelling and seeing new things.

And so it was that the eldest son came to a kingdom that was in mourning because the king's daughter had been taken prisoner be a terrible troll. Basil, for such was the prince's name, was told that the hand of the princess and half the kingdom awaited him who freed her. At least, thought Basil, a chance for gain, and greed overcoming fear he offered his services to the king. All attempts thus far had failed and the king was glad to accept for brave princes were few in that land.

Off set Basil to the troll's castle which was two days ride away. At the end of the second day he sighted the castle but as he approached he saw that it sat high on a cliff and before the cliff was a huge ravine. Luckily, a tree had fallen across the gap making a bridge. It was too narrow for his horse to cross so he tied it to a another tree. Then he turned to cross the ravine.

"I would not do that if I were you," called a passing huntsman. "That tree is not secure and will surely topple into the ravine. If you travel east for two days you will reach the end of the ravine and find a path that leads directly to the castle."

"I have not got two days to spare," said Basil, and he walked across the tree to the other side quite safely.

Being strong and lithe Basil was able to climb the cliff without too much trouble and was soon outside the castle gates. Showing no fear he walked straight through the gates and was caught by the troll who put him in the deepest dungeon.

The second son, Bruce, did not travel as fast as his brother. His good intentions were soon forgotten as he enjoyed himself, stopping at every inn and tavern to sample their delights. At last he had no money left and was not welcome at such places anymore. It was at this time that he too arrived in the kingdom terrified by the terrible troll, a full two years after Basil. 
Having heard the king's plight he promptly went and offered his services. The king once again was joyful and he even gave Bruce provisions for the journey.

Now Bruce was not particularly brave and he did not make haste to the troll's castle. Before long, however, his store of provisions began to get low and he knew he could put it off no longer. By the by he too came to the ravine and found the fallen tree. Seeing no other way over he prepared to cross.

"I would not do that if I were you," called a woodcutter who was working nearby, and he gave the same advice as the huntsman had given to his brother.

"That is too far to travel," said Bruce, who even though he was not looking forward to climbing the cliff was too lazy to take the long safer route.

Unfortunately for Bruce the good living had taken its toll. He was now very fat and could not keep his balance. He fell off the trunk and into the ravine. The ravine was very deep and he fell past the barred windows of his brother's prison. Basil saw him fall but did not recognise him.

Benjamin, the youngest son, travelled at a sedate pace. He was carefree and willing to face whatever perils presented themselves. He had not been travelling for long when he came across a youth lying by the side of the road. A fallen tree lay nearby and it seemed that it had hit the youth on falling. When he came to his senses the youth told Benjamin how he had been cutting down the tree only for it to fall the wrong way. By good fortune it had only struck the youth a glancing blow, still it had broken his arm. Benjamin put him on his horse and led him home. The youth's mother was in despair when she saw her son because they had to live on the money he earnt chopping wood. With his broken arm he could not work.

"Fear not," said Benjamin, kindly, "for I will stay and chop wood until your son's arm is better."

So for a while Benjamin became a woodcutter. He always stood well away from a falling tree lest it fall towards him instead of away from him. Thus he fared well and though not skilled in the work he had no mishap befall him during his time as a woodcutter. Presently, when the son's arm was better Benjamin took his leave.

A little further on his travels Benjamin met an old woman who was making slow progress due to the two large buckets of water that she was carrying.

"Good day to you good woman," Benjamin greeted her. "Let me carry those for you for I can see that you are weary."

The old woman was grateful for the offer and Benjamin carried the buckets while she rode his horse. She told him how the stream had used to run right past her cottage but she had angered a passing witch who had dammed up the stream up in revenge thus making it flow on a different course.

"Fear not," said Benjamin, "for I will free the dam."

What the witch had created with a wave of her wand took Benjamin days to remove. Huge boulders stood in the old stream bed diverting the water from its true course. Benjamin toiled hard removing the boulders, always taking care lest on should fall on him. At last the final boulder had been removed and the stream gurgled happily along its old path. The old woman could now easily collect water again and Benjamin resumed his journey.

So it was with Benjamin. Whenever he came upon someone in trouble he stayed a while to help. Thus almost five years had passed  when he reached the kingdom where his two brothers had ended up. The king had given up all hope by this time and was near to death from grief.

"Fear not, Your Majesty," said Benjamin, "For I will free the princess."

At once Benjamin set off towards  the trolls castle and soon he came to the ravine. He noticed the fallen tree but as he looked at it a peddler passed by.

"I would not try to cross that way," he advised. "That tree trunk is unsafe and must surely topple."

"I was of the same mind myself," agreed Benjamin. "Is there another way to cross?"

"If you travel for two days along the ravine you will come to its end and there you will find  a path that leads up to yonder castle."

Benjamin thanked the peddler and started along the ravine, having first toppled the tree into the depths so that no passer-by would be tempted to cross it and so fall to their death. Just as the peddler had said , at the end of the second day Benjamin came upon the path leading up to the troll's castle. Not wanting to announce his arrival he left his horse at the bottom of the path and then stealthily made his way up to the castle. The gates were open but fearing a trap he kept to the shadows so the troll would not see him. In this way he came upon the troll without being seen. Quickly drawing his sword he chopped off the troll's head and placed it in a sack.

Benjamin did not know that his brother was a prisoner in the dungeon and so he started to search the castle for the princess. He found her in the topmost room of a high tower. On seeing her he was struck by her great beauty and loved her deeply from that first moment. Unlike her father the princess had never given up hope of being rescued and as he had been weak and so near death she was so radiant and full of joy.

Just as they were about to leave the castle they heard a loud banging from below.

"Troll! Where is my food?" bellowed a voice.

Benjamin went to see who it was that was shouting so and to his surprise he found his brother, Basil. The troll had been feeding him well so that he might feast off him later on. So fat was he now that he could hardly pass through the door of his cell.

They had only one horse between them and naturally Benjamin offered it to the princess. However, Basil said that he could not walk being so fat so he rode the horse. Whilst riding along Basil was thinking how he could be rid of his little brother. With Benjamin out of the way he would have the princess, half her father's kingdom and having fared so well would follow his father as king. At last he hit upon a plan and he awaited the right moment to carry it out.

"That night as the others slept Basil picked up a rock and hit Benjamin on the head with it as he lay there. Then he was able to tie up his hands and feet. Next he started to tie up the sleeping princess but at this she woke up.

"Scream and I will lop off your head," he told her. With that he placed her on the horse, mounted behind her and rode off leaving his brother to the wolves.

Presently Benjamin awake. His head throbbed madly and it was some seconds before he realised that his hands and feet were bound. By good foresight rather than fortune he carried a spare knife in his boot. With a little trouble he was able to free himself and then he set off at a run.

The next day he came to a stop outside a small town where a signpost warned of a plague. The town stood by a river and in the centre stood the only bridge for miles around. Better to find another way than to risk catching the plague, thought Benjamin, as he gave he town a wide berth. Even now when he desperately wanted to make good speed he took no chances.

This action added a week to his journey. When he finally reached the palace where dwelled the princess there was great rejoicing, much to his surprise. He had believed that his brother would have been made out to be the hero. Such was nearly the case but Basil had not taken care. Wishing to travel as quickly as possible he had ridden through the plagued town and over the bridge. Some days later, whilst celebrating his false deeds of heroism he took ill and died. The princess was then able to tell her father the truth but she had believed it to have been too late for her saviour. Now she was overjoyed.

Benjamin and the princess were married but he did not take half of her father's kingdom. Instead he took her home and on the death of his own father became king. He ruled wisely and carefully for many years.

WHAT WE LEARN FROM THIS

There is a saying which goes "It is better to be safe than sorry." What this means is it is better to take care and make safeguards beforehand rather than being sorry that you did not take them at a later date. Benjamin's brothers always took the short cut, whether through haste or laziness does not matter. By failing to take care and therefore ignoring the dangers they did not triumph. Time spent on preparation or precautions is not wasted but is in fact well spent. Benjamin knew this and by doing so he prospered.